It’s been 20 years since my struggles with depression began and in that time, I’ve experienced my fair share of invisible symptoms. Those invisible symptoms are part of why the severity of my depression was so easy to hide for the better part of my life.
The interesting thing about the invisible symptom I’m going to talk about here is that it’s also a visible symptom that simply goes unnoticed or is written off as “lazy.”
For the better part of three years, I have not slept in my own bed. The only times I’ve slept on a bed in that time were when I went on trips. Otherwise, I rotated between different sofas in the house.I’ve always been what you would consider a “messy” person. I try on eight different outfits before deciding on one, and all of the clothes end up on my bed or on the floor. I leave empty or half-empty soda bottles all around the house. Sometimes I leave half-empty coffee cups for weeks on end until they smell. My laundry hamper is always overflowing or close to overflowing. In fact, I’ve barely done any laundry in the last three years. Sometimes I just buy new socks or underwear instead of digging through the war zone that becomes my bedroom. I leave the windows open and never dust when the windowsill inevitably gets covered in dust, dirt and dead bugs. There are probably dozens of other messy habits I have that I could write about.
But the thing is, I’m not a messy person.
Source: When Depression Makes You Seem Like a ‘Messy’ Person